Water bottles expire because plastic is a drama queen, your mouth is a petri dish, and companies want your wallet. The actual H₂O molecules are immortal—they’ve been around since the dinosaurs sipped them. So drink up, but check if your bottle smells like a shower shoe. If it does, you’ve been served a science lesson wrapped in a pun. Stay hydrated, and remember: the expiration date is just a suggestion from a plastic bottle’s attorney.
Now go drink some non-expired water. And maybe invest in a reusable one—for the planet, and for your taste buds. Cheers, you magnificent water-drinking weirdo.
