Yes, a bird. A black-and-white one that looks innocent. But during spring, males turn into feathered missiles of hate. They dive-bomb anyone near their nest.
They have been known to swoop joggers, cyclists, and little kids. They aim for the eyes. They will draw blood. Last year, a magpie killed a man riding a bike near a park.
They don’t care about your feelings. If you walk under a tree with a magpie, you’re basically in a combat zone. Wear a helmet. Or an ice cream bucket. I’m serious.
