Here’s something to think about while you’re lying on the floor: Did you know that the hottest temperature ever recorded on Earth was 134°F in Death Valley in 1913? That’s hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk—literally. People actually did that experiment on YouTube. The egg didn’t cook all the way, but it did look sad and rubbery, which is basically how we all feel at 95°F.
So, use this time to ponder deep questions, like “Why did I buy a black car?” or “Is it legal to sleep in a bathtub full of ice?” The answer to the second is: yes, and it’s glorious. Just don’t fall asleep and wake up as a human popsicle. That would be a weird news story.
