If you want to get drunk from wine, here’s your blueprint: drink on an empty stomach. The alcohol will hit your brain like a cannonball. Pair it with carbonated mixers like soda water—the bubbles force alcohol into your bloodstream faster. It’s science, but also a recipe for regrettable karaoke.
But if you want to avoid that “I’m drunk and crying over a rom-com” feeling, eat something fatty, like cheese or bread. Fat slows down absorption. That’s why fancy cheese boards are essentially alcohol training wheels. You’re welcome.
How Much Wine To Get Drunk?
The biggest surprise? Champagne gets you drunk faster than still wine. The carbonation allows alcohol to bypass your stomach lining and enter your blood directly. So go ahead and toast—just know that you’re playing with fire. Literally, because the bubbles tickle your nose and you forget you’re drinking firewater.
The Verdict (and a Warning)
So, can you get drunk from wine? Yes, easily, embarrassingly. One bottle of wine can contain the same alcohol as a whole six-pack of beer. That’s why wine moms are a stereotype—they’re not functional; they’re highly skilled at masking inebriation with passive-aggressive comments about neighbor’s lawn.
Just remember: wine is a social lubricant and a personality amplifier. After two glasses, you’ll think you can dance salsa. After four, you’ll cry about the ending of The Notebook. After a full bottle, you’ll be texting your ex about how “the moon reminds me of you.” Don’t ask me how I know.
In conclusion, treat wine with respect. It’s not just a sophisticated beverage—it’s a delicious trap. So go ahead, pour yourself a glass. But if you’re questioning whether you can get drunk from it, the answer is already in your hand. Drink responsibly, or at least have a funny story to tell later.
